David engaged in many such solitary battles. Because of this loneliness, he would play the harp, sing, and weep, and hunt. Of what was thought to be an unfortunate circumstance, this allowed him to be a great musician, sensitive, and fearless. The youngest, who would not have any opportunities to practice leadership, broke out because circumstances do not define you.
God wanted a broken vessel.
God has a univsersity. Few enroll, even fewer graduate. He was has people who claim to have God's authority, and don't. People who claim to be broken, and aren't. And people who do have hi authority, but who are mad and unbroken. And there are a great mixture of everything in between. In God's sacred school of submission and brokenness, why are there so few students? Because all students in this school suffer much pain. It's often the unbroken ruler (whom God sovereign picks) who causes the pain. Saul was God's chosen way to crush David. Was a divine ordination for Saul (unbroken) to be placed over David's authority.
You have your eyes on the wrong Saul, and you will blame him alone for your present hell. But God has his eyes on another King Saul, the King Saul in you. David would have grown up to be King Saul II except that God cut away the Saul inside David's heart. That operation took years and was a brutalizing experience that almost killed the patient, but God used the outer King Saul as the scalpel and tongs to remove this inner Saul in David.
There in those caves, drowned in the sorrow of his song of his sorrow, David became the best hymn writer and the greatest comforter of broken hearts.
The heartache and suffering from being chased to be killed, misunderstood as the evil/enemy. But, Suffering was giving birth. Humility was being born. By earthly measures, he uses a shattered man, by heaven's measure, a broken one.
This is the true way of leadership/conversion. David's followers, while he was living in caves, were a bunch of broken, angry people: Thieves, liars, complainers, and rebellions. But with David, they all submitted, even if he never spoke of the word submission. Legalism is not a word found in the vocabulary of fugitive. Nevertheless, they cleaned up their outward lives as well as inward. They didn't even think about the topic, much less discuss it.
Joab complained and rebuked David. David says "Better he kill me than I learn his ways. Better he kill me than I become as he is."
Saul was God's anointed and truly a warrior who masterfully fulfilled his duty as a successful king.
People pray without ulterior motives and sincerely, but dark desires are hidden in their hearts. And the thing is, God still answers those prayers. However, those are outward clothing of the Spirit's power and the inward filling of the spirit's life. But the monster must be dealt with.
Is the authority that's placed on you David or Saul? Only God knows, but He won't tell you."Are you so certain your king is a Saul and not a David that you are willing to take the position of God and go to war against your Saul?" "Then thank God you did not live in the days of Crucifixion."
-The way you react to that leader, be he David or Saul, reveals a great deal about you.
Life is submission. David taught the art of patience. Legalism is nothing but a leader's way of avoid suffering. He feared no rebellion because He didn't mind being dethroned.
"Beginning empty-handed alone frightens the best of men. It also speaks volume of just how sure they are that God is with them. Their words, if truly understood, tells of their insecurity"
Absalom is pure and noble, but he hasn't been through the trials that David had gone through. He is only pure and noble.To stop Absalom from dethroning the kingdom, David would become Saul.
Perhaps David's time to rule was over. "The throne is not his to take, protect or to keep. What kind of monster could Absalom become if he overthrew his own father? We don't know, but we'll let God be God, it's all possible. Only he knows the truth, and it seems he will not tell."
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